Independence and Closeness
Your book „Die ganze Scheiße mit der Zeit“ ("The Whole Shit with Time") touches on the themes of freedom, independence, self-determination as values and privileges. How important is this to you?
I am fundamentally someone who can be very good at being alone. And I also enjoy being alone. This is actually rooted in my childhood, as I grew up relatively alone without siblings, without a father. Possibly, others who have grown up similarly might later strive for exactly the opposite, namely a large family. I am also like that, I enjoy closeness, but I also like to have the option to withdraw. I believe that one can only be good with another person and potentially love them if one has first developed the ability to be good at being alone. I am very skeptical of men or women who sail from one relationship to the next without reflecting or taking a breath to find themselves.
But for some people, nothing worse can happen than finding themselves. Because nothing terrifies humans as much as a confrontation with themselves.
Spirituality and Optimism
Do you believe that there is life after death?
If I knew that, I would be God. But I find the thought appealing. And I find the idea of living again adventurous and amusing. If I were to live again – as I have written in my book – I would like to be a fashion designer in Italy in my next life. I believe it would be simply beautiful to dress people for the different seasons. And I would even include shrouds in the range, because I find the thought of being coffined in a scratchy, inferior fabric for burial - which I would claim for myself - which then scratches my knee for eternity unbearable. I would like to be coffined in an excellent fabric. But back to the question: I am optimistic that there is something, that happens. And I know that in Germany, pessimists appear more intellectual and profound, and optimists a bit naive. But I have decided for myself that I find pessimists intellectually pathetic and optimists adventurous in a good sense.
I also believe that there are magical places, especially where churches are located. Near Neuburg an der Donau, close to Ingolstadt, there is a monastery. I am absolutely certain that those who began building there in 1100 AD felt the place was magical. There are places in the world, where you are able to feel that they are different from the others and where you enter into some relationship with what was there before. And I side with Goethe, who once said, "If you don't feel it, you won't understand it."
Where do I come from and who am I?
Barbara Schöneberger once said that a topic gains significance when you talk about it. You give a topic incredible depth. Does the foundation for this lie in your education?
It was clear to me very early on in high school that after graduation, I wanted to study what I was interested in, history and philosophy. It was also clear to me that I would then try to become a producer and go to film school in Munich. And I really succeeded, despite the very difficult selection process - only 30 out of 800 applicants were accepted.
I was interested in philosophical questions very early on. And I can't really imagine how one can live as a sensitive, adult person, if one is not interested in history and philosophy. Because those are the questions of life, in history "Where do I come from?" and in philosophy "Who am I?". And it's hard for me to imagine living with someone who isn't interested in that.
Freedom, Democracy, and the Power of Language
Is freedom something present or is it only recognized in its absence?
There is this beautiful saying that paradise only reveals itself as paradise when you are driven out of it. That in hindsight you realize: You were very well off there and maybe didn't appreciate it. This may be true, but still I do feel very free now in how I can live, in how I am allowed to feel, emotionally, familially, economically, and I am grateful – not proud, because that is a word in the German language that I do not like at all, so I replace it with grateful – so I am grateful that I am allowed to live like this, although it is also connected to my performance and my willingness to work, for which I am incredibly grateful. And I can already enjoy that now. I believe that one feels very much when freedom is lacking. So, if living in a non-democratic country.
In addition to the adjective proud, I have completely eliminated other words from my vocabulary. I never use the word stress. I never use the word problem. Why? Because I believe that not only do thoughts influence language, but language also influences thoughts. So, if you hear yourself say "I'm incredibly stressed right now", then you are. But as long as you and the ones that are closest to you wake up healthy in a democratic state in the morning ... Be happy and everything else is everyday topics or everyday challenges. So, I would advise everyone: Replace the word problem with challenge and stress with the fact that you are allowed to solve everyday problems, that you are not lying in the hospital and are allowed to meet challenges. And if you are doing well, be grateful and not proud.
What is Home?
You have lived in many places, in many cities. Do you have roots?
My geographical roots lie in Kassel where I spent the first 20 years of my life. But as is often the case when you come from mid-sized cities, when I go back there now, there is only one friend from that time still living there, all the others have left or partly died. It's a bit sad when I return to Kassel, because I know the city incredibly well, but all the people who once meant something to me there are no longer alive or scattered around the world – which is also nice, because I have friends all over the world and a guest room almost everywhere.
So, my concept of home is not defined by a region. German language is home for me. But also Europe, that is, democracies. And whenever, for example, I travel to countries for filming that do not have a real democracy, I feel uncomfortable after a very short time and get claustrophobic. I need the feeling of living in a free country, in a liberal country. But home is also always, romantically and truly, my wife. And I am an absolute city person, I like to live in Berlin, Hamburg, Munich, Cologne, that is, in a city or region with more than one million inhabitants. I can't explain why, but I love metropolises. If I really had the choice, I would have an apartment in Berlin, Munich, Hamburg, and Düsseldorf each and stay in each apartment for only three or four weeks and then move on to the next apartment. Because those are the cities where I have always felt comfortable. And I think that's the point: If I had lived in Cologne or Stuttgart for longer, I would probably have felt comfortable there, too, and would have mentioned that now. But I once said, for me, the three or four cities where I have lived are the three or four friends you can't invite together, because they wouldn't understand each other.
Reason and Boredom
In earlier times of TV production, after a show people used to party until the morning, today they have a wine spritzer together and go home. Do you think this is a phenomenon that runs through society as a whole?
People are more health-conscious. According to my grandmother's beauty ideal, a man had to be stately, so he had to have some meat on his bones. If he was slim and fit, he was a thin wimp. That shows how beauty ideal has changed over many generations. I still remember, in my childhood, there were health food stores for healthy food; my mother always said that's where the women went and the men who couldn't find a partner. And today there are organic stores everywhere. Today there are fitness centers, back then my father had an expander for training, hanging on the bathroom door, but it was never used. So, of course, the entire awareness of body, health, and so on has completely changed. I notice that breweries are selling less beer, French winemakers are abandoning vineyards because people are drinking less and less wine. And as always in life, there are two sides to it. The good side is that we are all living longer. We are healthier, we’re looking better, we take care of ourselves. And especially at a certain age, there’s no need of having the appearance of a 20-year-old anymore, but somehow we are ... more cultivated. The downside: There is an incredibly dreary, rational boredom looming. I find that a shame. Period. But I don't know what it's like today, how people in their mid-thirties or late twenties live. I hope they live very differently from me now and really let loose after work and party. I hope so, because at some point, the time is over, and then it's nice if you can look back on something and say: It was quite nice. When I think back to my wild times, they were politically or philosophically underpinned, it wasn't just about drinking – Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'n' Roll was a philosophy of life, it had to do with freedom, with liberation, with overcoming bourgeois pettiness or the pettiness of bourgeois conformity. You have lived in many places, in many cities. Do you Make love, not war. Give peace a chance.
Age and the Perception of Time
What do you think: Is getting older a necessary consequence of growing up?
My son once asked me how you know when you're grown up. I thought about it for a while, because that's not a stupid question. I finally answered, that I believe you notice it by having many experiences of saying goodbye; saying goodbye to friends you've fallen out with, saying goodbye to places you've lived, saying goodbye to people who have died. And saying goodbye to phases of life. You can't live the life of a thirty-year-old at 67, you'd make a fool of yourself. When we are young, we perceive time more slowly because we make so many new experiences. That's secure brain research. What we experience for the first time, what is new, lasts longer in our perception. From a certain age you don't experience anything new anymore. First sex is over, driver's license is obtained, first child is born, first good salary is paid out ... That's why I sometimes quite like being in Kassel. That's the city of firsts in my life, the first kiss, the first sex, the first driver's license, the first time leaving home, the first experiences of someone dying. All of that happened in Kassel by chance, and I sometimes think about that when I walk through the streets. Sometimes also very melancholic. The funny thing is, that for example the girlfriend, with whom you had sex for the first time, is a grandmother today. I have to get used to that a bit. Elke Heidenreich once said the beautiful sentence that wrinkles are the sign that you have lived, that you have spent nights partying, that you have worked, that you have cried, that you have laughed, that you have had sorrow. Wrinkles are the proof that you have lived.
Travel, Places, People
You are often on the road and an experienced traveler. Can you give us a travel recommendation?
I always enjoy being by the Mediterranean Sea. Corsica, Spain, Greece, Italy, I'm not fixed on one place. I like the mediterranean people, cooking, laughing, drinking, living. And it always smells particularly good there. I thoroughly know Europe, I know the USA very well, I know a lot of the world. But I would also like to see countries that are not so interesting for tourists. For example, I would like to go to Bangladesh or Belize, formerly British Honduras. I like countries that are completely undiscovered by tourism, beeing a guest with people and watching where they work and live, but when I see the first shops with sun umbrellas, air mattresses, and inflatable crocodiles on the beach, I feel like fleeing. Tourist infrastructure is the ultimate horror for me. I am not really interested in countries. I am interested in regions and people.
Interview by Sabine Kühlwetter Meiers
